Are They Enemies?

I am writing this entry base on what I think. I am not trying to offend anyone. Examples are from several dramas which are not based on true stories. 

It is raining! Want to go out? You just need an umbrella! Why should you dread about rainy day when all you need is an umbrella in order to go out? Sometimes, you don't even need one so you are able to enjoy the touch of rain!

Who are your enemies? 

Let us look at the different situations below: 

Your mother who just nag at you for not tidying your room and shout back at her, then she nag on you for being so rude and you question on why she can't use a proper tone to ask you to tidy your room, then she scold you for teaching her. 

Your father who chided you for lazing around then ask you to go and help your mum, and you argue with him why he never help. In the end he scolded you or hit you because you just talk back.  

Your brother who hit you and you hit him back, then he hit back you hit back, then in the end either he cry or you cry. In the end both were asked why are you hitting each other, you say he hit you first, and he says you did something nasty before he hit you. 

Your sister who accidentally tear your expensive clothes and you ask her to buy new ones. Next, she said she already apologized, then you will say apologize won't recover your clothes to normal. You demand her to get new ones, in the end she is not willing and you start to scold her or hit her and take her things and spoil it. 

Your children quarrel for something. You try to stop them and but they still continue. Until you take out a cane to hit them then they stop. They are still unhappy about each other, but now they are unhappy with you too. 

Your uncles and aunties visit. They started to chit chat with your mum and dad. They start to talk about children, and then mum and dad start to compare you and cousins. Your cousins are studying universe, and you are taking your normal stream or you are working only with a Diploma Cert. Next thing you know, you start to get envy and jealous with them. 

The neighbor put rubbish at your doorsteps and you start to knock on their door furiously. You ask them why they threw rubbish on your doorsteps, and demand an apology but they say they never throw. You insist that they had throw because they are the nearest neighbor you have, or you might have offended them so the greatest suspicion is them. In the end, you all quarrel for that rubbish again. 

The car owner who cut your way while you are driving and you start to curse and swear. The driver shows apology or ignored you, then you start to wave your hand furiously at them and or point middle finger. In the end, the driver will drive as fast as possible to get away from you or purposely form an accident. 

Maybe some of the above are very familiar to some you. 

Think of all the situations that have caused you to become unhappy. 

Enemies are those people that you get angry with because they did something that make you feel unhappy. Once you have the slightest dislike towards them, they become your enemy. 

When we pause and think; are they really worth for us to be dislike? It is like a never-ending cycle. You shout she shout he shout then you shout and so forth. 

They are all human beings. They are kind hearted people by nature. We need not make ourselves miserable by hating them, dislike them, grudge against them. 

Why are we forming enemies throughout our life, when we can treat them as our friends, mentors and teachers? We can learn from them. 

You might think HOW?

Just remember, only those unpleasant situations can train your morality. Whether you are parents, teachers, principals, bosses, CEOs, managers, workers, officers, coolies, students, etc, as long as you are a human being, it is time for us to treat all these unpleasant experiences as a stepping stone to learn to become understanding, to be tolerant, to be forgiving and to be kind and other morales. 

If the others are never kind to us, as long as we do our best to be kind to all around us without expectation for return then we will become happier. 

I think the first 2 situations: both parents & children have to do their part together to explore & communicate on what is going wrong instead of hitting and scolding because children always see their parents as role model even when they are grown up. 

In another words, what you want your children to grow up to be? If you want them to acquire virtues and morality, what do you have in yourselves? Sometimes when children start to show no respect to you, it is time to reflect on yourself. You are not always right. 

Even though I am not parents, I can understand, raising up a child is not easy. 

But if you want a child, then you should put in effort to raise it up and nurture it. Not just leave them aside and hoping that they will struggle on their own. Even if you were treated that way when you are young, it is time to dump that thinking away. 

To bear a child for the mother is already so difficult. So many unknowns might happen during the pregnancy. 

Even if you have it accidentally, you should still bear the fullest responsibilities whether it will end up a bad or good person. 


A child is born, not knowing what is right, what is wrong. Children always act differently from what we adult think with whatever things that came across them. 

It is not by luck that a child is a perfect person. It is through great effort, unconditional love, understanding, tolerance, kindness, learning, knowledge and through meeting its needs. Unconditional love means want it to be happy mentally/spiritually and not materially. 

It is by facing challenges of raising up a child. Different child have different approaches to deal with. But all children, you need to be firm, you must be loving and kind, you must treat them with 

equanimity. 

Different method, different approaches, but you must show them the same kindness. Only through understanding and tolerance, then parenting jobs will become easier and fruitful. 

In order for all of us to be happy mentally/spiritually, we have to be taught. We have to learn. We have to acquire knowledge. Same for children. 

If we want the future generations to become better people, we have to depend on the parents too. Not just teachers! 

If the children did something wrong, I hope they will be educated by the parents then the teachers then the society... Sometimes, you may claim they are too rebellious. What are the reasons behind? Have you tried to find out?

I do understand parents are affected by their own parents too. Hope you have forgiven them if they have done wrongly and be grateful with what they have taught you through the experiences you have gone through.

Wish all of you happy! Smile ;)